Disney Meets Discworld
by BCBoo
Summary: I was really bored so i re-wrote some Disney songs to star some of our favorite characters. Some are good, some arn't so good, but all in all a good laugh. *New Song Added*
1. Stay In Here

To the tune of the little song Frodo sings to Quasimodo before Quasi sings out there.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

(In Leonard's room)

Vetinari:

The world is ruthless, the world is erroneous

It's I alone who you can trust in this whole city

I am your only friend

I, who keep you, stock you, feed you, dress you

I who encourage your ideas

How can I protect you, man, unless you always stay in here?

Away in here.

Remember what life was like Leonard.

You are a genius (Leonard): I am a genius

And you are brilliant (Leonard): And I am brilliant

And these are crimes for which the Disc shows little pity

You do not comprehend (Leonard): You are my one protector

Out there, they'll revile you as insane (Leonard): I am not insane

Out there, they will hate and disapprove and criticize (Leonard): Not insane

Why invite their slander and alarm, stay in here

Be faithful to me (Leonard): I'm faithful

Grateful to me (Leonard): I'm grateful

Do as I say, obey, (Leonard): I'll stay

(Both): In here.


	2. Om Help The Undead

To the tune of 'God help the outcasts' from The Hunchback Of Notre Dame.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

(Reg has gone into an Om Church)

Reg Shoe

I don't know if you can hear me

Or if you're even there

I don't know if you would listen

To a zombie's prayer

Yes, I know I'm just undead

I shouldn't speak to you

Still I see your face and wonder

Are you the undead too?

Om help the undead

Cranky from the death

Show them the mercy

They don't find with out breath

Om help my people

We look to you still

Om help the undead

Or nobody will

All I ask for is thread

So I can get by

But I know so many

Less lucky than I

Please help my people

The rotting and pulseless

I thought we all were

The children of Om

Om help the undead

To stubborn to die.


	3. Drumknott! Drumknott!

To the tune of 'Cinderella Cinderella' from Cinderella (Duh)

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Drumknott:

Drumknott, Drumknott, All I ever hear is Drumknott

From the moment that I get up,

Till I pass out on my desk

There isn't any let up

I hear him calling

"Hand in this paperwork and tell so and so to see me now!"

You can do them at the same time, Drumknott!"

How lovely it would be if I could

Have some rest

But in the middle of my relaxing

He's always summoning me

"Drumknott!"

Rats:

Drumknott, Drumknott

Night and day it's always Drumknott

Copy this, call the plasterer

Go get Vimes, do the filing

And the writing and the posting

They always keep him hopping

He goes around in circles

Till he's very, very dizzy

Still he hollers

Keep a-busy Drumknott!


	4. I Won't Say I'm A Duke

This is my favourite. To the tune of 'I won't Say I'm In Love' From Hercules.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

(Vimes in his garden)

Vimes:

If there's a prize for pitiful existence.

I guess I've already won that.

Nothing is worth the aggravation.

Isn't gonna happen, I'm not gonna do that.

Vimes' inner Duke:

Who'd ya think you're kidding?

This is what you've always wanted.

Try to keep it hidden, mate I can see right through ya.

Man you can't conceal it,

I know how you're feeling- what title you're thinking of.

Vimes:

No chance, no way, I won't take it, no no!

Vimes' inner Duke:

You laugh, you cry, why refuse it? Uh-oh.

Vimes:

It's too upper class I won't say I'm a Duke.

Vimes' inner Duke:

Shoo doop, shoo doop, ooo ooo ooo.

Vimes:

I thought my ego had learned its lesson.

It feels so good when you start out.

My head is screaming it's too much work man!

Unless you're dying to wear those damn tights!

Ohh...

Vimes' inner Duke:

You keep on denying 

What you want and how you're feeling.

Mate I not buying, 

I saw your mouth hit the floor

Face it like a grown up 

When you gonna own up?

That you want want want it bad.

Vimes:

Ohh!

No chance no way I won't take it no no.

Vimes' inner Duke:

Give up or give in check the papers you're a Duke.

Vimes:

This scene won't play I won't say I'm a Duke.

Vimes' inner Duke:

Your upper class read my lips you're a Duke.

Vimes:

You're way off base I won't take it.

Vimes' inner Duke:

He won't say, "Duke"

Vimes:

Get off my case I won't take it.

Vimes' inner Duke:

Man don't be proud it's okay you're a Duke.

Vimes:

Ohhhh. At least out loud I won't say I'm a Duke.


	5. My Lullaby

To the lullaby from The Loin King 2 Simba's Pride. Picture Carrot's mum as insane.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

(The day of the lethal deadly demise of Carrot's parent)

Carrot's real Mum:

Sleep my little Carrot

Let your dreams take wing

One day when you're big and strong

You will be a king

Carrot: Mama! (Then he promptly falls asleep)

Carrot's real Mum: sleep well my little prince; tonight we travel through the Ramtops

Our families been exiled mistreated

Left alone with no security

When I think of what that Stoneface Vimes did I get a little tense

But I think of a future so pretty

That I don't feel so dismal

'Coz it soothes my inner queen

And it helps me get some rest

The sound of Vimes' dying gasp

The Patrician running in fear

Ankh-Morpork's mournful cry

That's my lullaby

Now the past I've tried forgetting

And the city I could forgive

Trouble is I know it's petty

But I hate to let the Vimes' live

Carrot's real Sister:

So you found yourself somebody who will rule the city in the Patrician's place

Carrot's real Mum:

Oh we will have to wait

Carrot must grow up big and strong

The crowning of the centaury

The cry of Vimes' wife

A symphony of wealth

Oh my

That's my lullaby

Lorenzo is gone

But I am still around

I will love this little lad...

'Til he learns to be a king

With a lust for being in charge!

Carrot's Dad:

Sleep ya little termite…I-I mean precious little thing

Carrot's sister:

One day when you're big and strong…

Carrot's real Mum:

You will be a king!

The pounding of the drums of royalty

The thrill of Carrot's mighty reign

Sister:

The joy of vengeance!

Dad:

Testifies!

Carrot's real Mum:

I can hear the cheering

Brother and sister:

Carrot what a guy

Carrot's real Mum:

And when the time is nearing

And then our flag will fly…

Against revenge filled sky!

That's my lullaby!


	6. There's A Party Here In AnkhMorpork

This is to 'There's a party here in Agrabah' from Aladdin and the prince of thieves. I missed out loads of verses so it's not the whole thing.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Colon:

There's a party here in Ankh-Morpork,

There's excitement in the air

People pouring in from near and far

'Cause Vimes and Rambkin are gonna have a "weddin'"

There's a party here in Ankh-Morpork,

Everybody will be there

So if you're a beggar or an Assassin,

Do somethin' with yer hair!

Vimes' gettin' married, and it's gonna be

The wedding of the century

The Captains gettin' married, and you're gonna see

Just how much we can do!

There's a party here in Ankh-Morpork,

And it's got a certain flow

If a drunkard could've come so far,

Maybe I could do it

Sure, there's nothin' to it!

Lord Rust and Lord Venturi:

There's a party here in Ankh-Morpork, 

But we're not sure that we'll go

For although the bride is lah-tee-dah,

The groom is awfully low

Colon: (reporter style)

And now we take you down to the university

Where everyone has celebrated all night long

Without a dragon and all of 'is malice,

Everybody's happy

What could possibly go wrong??

GONNE:

There's a party here in Ankh-Morpork

And I'm gonna shoot 'em dead!

Nobby:

There's a party here in Ankh-Morpork

And the loot is pourin' in!

I like this wedding stuff so far!

Maybe if I'm pleasant,

I'll get to keep a present!

Colon:

There's a party here in Ankh-Morpork

Yes, they're filling up the room

But there's something missing. Yes...ah hah!

Ridcully:

Where is the groom?!?!?


	7. When Carrot Wasn't Here

This one isn't very good. To the tune of 'When she loved me' from Toy story 2.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

(Vimes singing)

When Carrot wasn't here

Everything was easy

Every hour was spent drunk

Living in the gutter

And when there was a crime

I wasn't there to be involved

And when Nobby was drunk so was I

When Carrot wasn't here

Through the summer and the fall

The city didn't need us, not at all

Just Bearhuggers and I together like it was meant to be

And when daytime came 

I recovered from the night 

And I knew that the city didn't need me

So Carrot turned up

I tried to stay the same 

But Carrot made sense

I was left alone

But still I waited for the day

When life would pull through for me

Lonely and sober

I never thought I'd be happy

Then Sybil smiled at me 

And held me 

And made me feel like I should do

Like she loved me

When she loved me

While somebody loves me

Everything is beautiful

Every hour we spend together

Lives within my heart

While she loves me.


	8. Ankh Morporkian Nights

**Dibbler:**    Oh I come from a city

From a very dirty city

Where the thieves and assassins roam

Where some think it is fun /Where it's flat and immense

To pie you in the face /And the smell is intense

It's corrupted, but hey--it's home!

When the wind's at your back

And the sun's never seen

And the wizards always think they're right

Come on down,

Stop on by

Hop a broomstick and fly

To another Ankh-Morporkian night!

Ankh-Morporkian nights

Like Ankh-Morporkian days

More often than not

Are smellier than sh*t

In a lot of good ways

Ankh-Morporkian nights

'Neath Ankh-Morporkian moons

A man off his guard

Could be inhumed and robbed

Out there on the streets.

Ah, hello and good evening to you worthy friend.

Please, please, come closer--_(Camera zooms in hitting_

_Dibbler in face) _Too close, a little too close.  _(Camera_

_zooms back out)_There.

Welcome to Ankh-Morpork.  City of magnitude, of rejection, 

and the finest merchandise this side of the river Ankh, on 

sale today, come on down!

Heh, heh.  Look at this! Yes!  Combination Bohkah and

skrumble maker--also makes Klatchian fries.  Will not break

_(taps it on table),_ will not--(_it falls apart_)--it

broke.  Ooohhh!  Look at this! _(Pulls out Tupperware_) I

have never seen one of these intact before.  This is the

famous XXXX Tupperware. Listen.  _(Pries it open,_

_makes raspberry sound.) _ Ah, still good. _(Camera begins_

_to pan to right.  Dibbler hurries to catch it.)_  Wait,

don't go!  _(Stop pan.)_ I can see that you're only

interested in the exceptionally rare.  I think then, you

would be most rewarded to consider...this.  _(Dibbler_

_pulls a sausage inna bun out from his sleeve.)_ Do not be

fooled by its commonplace appearance.  Like so many

things, it is not what is outside, but what is inside

that counts.  _(Another pan, this one slower to left._

_Again, Dibbler rushes to catch up.)_  This is no ordinary

Sausage-inna-bun!  It once changed the course of a young pig's life.

A young pig who liked this sausage-inna-bun was more than what he

seemed.  Full of meat.


End file.
